& ♥

Tuesday, March 31

Had a sudden to blog. Been, keeping too much stuffs inside my heart.. as usual, crying alone almost everyday... tried asking myself what actually it is but still no answers yet.

On msn chat with my indian pal Raj now and idiotic him is infact challenging to engaged in a topic that I dread most now.. A topic that I've been trying to avoid recently.. he's stating all the possibilities that I really don't wish it is. Still, as a guy I think he knows better how his fellow mates think.

To listern or just go ahead with what I want?

Yesterday, I met with Adan(e guy whom I had this r/s going on with). He gave me a surprise but I dont know why, I'm not happy at all. Just what isit that I want? Anyway, he can't give me those either now. Yet, I'm all along giving him what he wants. I just feel that as long as he's happy, i'm happy too... the most I expect from him is his promise to stay faithful to me...

1st time, I ever felt so silly.. just pray that its not like what Raj thinks it is..
Yours Turly, Niko 10:49 PM ♥